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2019年09月22日 12:12:00|来源:国际在线|编辑:QQ咨询
I Want to Get Out A bar owner locked up his place at 2 a. m. and went home to sleep. He had been in bed only a few minutes when the phone rang." What time do you open up in the morning ?" he heard an obviously inebriated man inquire.  The owner was so furious, he slammed down the receiver and went back to bed. A few minutes later there was another call and he heard the same voice ask the same question. "Listen," the owner shouted ,"there's no sense in asking me what time I open because I wouldn't let a person in your condition in..."  "I don't want to get in," the caller interjected. "I want to get out." 我要出去  在凌晨两点,酒吧店主锁了店门,回家睡觉。他刚躺下几分钟,这时电话响了。“你早上几点营业?”他听到一位明显已醉醺醺的男子的声音。  店主非常气愤,砰地一声挂上电话又上床去睡。几分钟后又有一个电话,他听到还是那个声音问同样的问题。“听着,”店主嚷道,“不要问我什么时候营业,因为我不会让你这种人进……”  “我不是想进来,”那人打断他的话,“我要出去。” /201106/141411Have you ever met people who seem to be happy all the time, and wonder what their secrets are? These people are contented, easy going, generous, and always have a positive outlook in life.Now, if you are conducting a research by asking "What make you a happy person"; they will reveal at least one or two of these five things below.Have a Sense of HumorLife is short, so put a little sense of humor in a stressful situation will keep your blood level maintained. Laugh about it, and suddenly you will lessen the burden.Happiness is contagious! If you are happy, the people around you will be happy. If you have a light sense of humor, your family will have a light sense of humor. Happiness is not a build-in mechanism when you were born; it is something you have to cultivate to exceed.Appreciate Your EnvironmentFind positive things around you instead what are bad or missing. Appreciate your surrounding will make you a happier person.If you look for positive attributes in everything and everywhere you go, you develop an appreciation for the world you live in.Be InspiredAllow other people to inspire you by listening to their stories, or simply just watch them. Let inspiration guides your life to a deeper meaning. If you are open, every single person you meet can be a motivation force in some ways.You can also be an inspirational figure by simply carrying a big smile on your face. Sometimes, turning a bad experience into something positive brings on a different effect.Give YourselfPhysically give yourself in doing such as cooking, or serving, or cleaning at a shelter or any other places, will fulfill the higher purpose in your life. When you give, you also receive. By putting yourself out there to do good for others make the meaning of giving more rewarding. There are a lot of things you can do in your community: cleaning a stretch of the road, or highway, or planning flowers in your city can help you feel belonged and hopeful.Count Your BlessingsThe blessings do not have to be big to count. Sometimes, the littlest thing can really mean more than winning a lottery, such as holding your child in your arms and receive a kiss. Sure, it is nice to have a million dollars in your bank account, but if you come home to an empty house without warm greetings; it is very sad. Count your tiniest blessings daily. It does wonder to your mind!Being a happy person takes work, and it is attainable. We might unable to be cheerful all the time, but with the right attitude and positive frame of mind, we can be one of the happy people, and we will inspire others to have a pleasant outlook in life. /200804/35926He's gentle, unworldly, highly attentive and charmingly old-fashioned. The catch? The very things that make Keith so attractive to Sarah are symptoms of Asperger's. Anna Moore meets the couples living with this surprisingly common conditionSarah Hendrickx and Keith Newton sit tilted towards one other, laughing a lot and disappearing down the occasional alley of in-jokes, as couples do when they're still in that early, besotted stage.Sarah Hendrickx and Keith Newton at Sarah’s home in Hove. 'He's so gorgeous he could have anyone - but not for long,' she says.Keith has just arrived at Sarah's home in Hove and they're clearly delighted by the prospect of the next few days together. As always, Keith has switched off his mobile phone because, as he puts it, 'my time here is with Sarah'. They won't see anyone else - Keith has no friends of his own and doesn't feel comfortable socialising - but plan to eat lots of chocolate, walk and watch television. 'We spend a lot of time feeling smug,' says Sarah, 'because we see other couples who don't look very happy.'In a few days, though, Keith will drive back to Wickham, Hampshire, 50 miles away, where he lives alone and works as a computer programmer. This will always be the case. Despite meeting five years ago, they won't 'progress' as other couples do. They'll neither live together nor have children. Although there's only a year between them, at 39 Keith is so gangly, gawky, boyish and cute that he could be ten years younger than he is.Yet Sarah - who had a child at 19 and has two marriages behind her - is confident that few women could put up with him. 'God, he's so gorgeous he could have anyone - but not for long,' she says, laughing. 'Three or four months max… then, when the conversation turns to homes and babies and bank accounts, he'd be gone!' The two burst into laughter.It wasn't always like this. The couple met through internet dating and the first stage of their relationship was fiery and fraught. To Sarah, Keith was 'a puzzle'. He'd plainly state that their blissful weekends were enough for him, that he'd never live with her or even move nearer. Sarah frequently found him selfish, cold and distant. Keith found Sarah hard work, demanding and 'screechy'.advertisementUltimately, only one thing allowed them to start again from scratch - they uncovered the reason for Keith's 'insensitivity', his aloofness, the fact that he could see no future with Sarah nor seemed to want one: Keith has Asperger's syndrome (AS).Such a late diagnosis is not uncommon. Asperger's - a developmental condition that falls within the autism spectrum - was identified more than 60 years ago but became a standard diagnosis only in 1992 when it entered the World Health Organisation's diagnostic manual. As a result, the majority of adults with the syndrome almost certainly grew up without knowing they had it.Estimates vary enormously as to the prevalence, but one in 100 people is thought to be on the autism spectrum, and it is more common in males by a ratio of nine to one. People with AS normally have above-average intelligence but great difficulties with empathy, communication and social interaction.People with AS struggle to understand the unwritten social rules that help most of us act and speak appropriately. They find it hard to decipher figures of speech, facial expressions and tones of voice, and are frequently (but unintentionally) concise and literal to the point of rudeness. Since the 'real world' becomes an extremely stressful place, many retreat into their own safe haven of routine, solitude and obsessive special interests.Today AS is likely to be recognised in a child, and his school will be told he needs special support. Twenty years ago, however, he'd be the 'geek' who didn't quite fit but was left to get on with it. And that struggle has continued into adulthood. For someone with AS, the minefield of relationships, marriage and parenthood can be the hardest part of all.Louise Corbett manages the National Autistic Society (NAS) helpline and confirms that more calls are coming from couples who have recognised Asperger's in their relationship.'When I started six years ago most of our calls were made by parents about their children,' she says. 'Now we get more adult-related calls than child-related.' As Asperger's seems to run in families, many women identify it in their husbands - or their husbands see it in themselves - only after their child has been diagnosed and they've the literature. 'They call in absolute shock,' says Corbett. 'Often they've been experiencing difficulties for years without knowing why. There's no way around it: Asperger's can be very hard to live with.'Maxine Aston, the author of Aspergers in Love (Jessica Kingsley, pound;14.95), is one of the few counsellors to work specifically with couples affected by AS. Her surveys and questionnaires from the past decade suggest that 75 per cent of such couples seek counselling. 'I'd almost say AS was a "relationship disorder",' she says. 'It affects communication, interaction and the ability to empathise. Any research will tell you they're the key ingredients for a successful relationship.' In Aston's experience - and desperate clients come from as far as Japan, New Zealand and Canada - Asperger's relationships follow a common pattern.'A huge number seem to meet on dating websites,' she says. 'For someone with AS it's the perfect route.' Where once many people with AS were effectively barred from the dating game, the internet now provides the perfect point of entry (it has, as Aston puts it 'opened the floodgates').Bypassing the enormous challenges involved in chatting someone up, it allows you to make a checklist and then select according to criteria. Although many people with AS are unemployed or underemployed, others are at the top of their profession. 'On paper they look amazing,' says Aston. 'Doctors, IT consultants, engineers, solicitors… They could be in their forties but have never married - so no baggage. The internet also allows them to build a rapport by email,' she continues. 'When they meet, women are often very charmed by this polite, gentle man with an old-fashioned appeal.'This was certainly true for Sarah who found Keith completely different to anyone she had known. 'At the end of our first date he kissed my cheek and shook my hand,' she recalls. 'So different to all the guys that ply you with rioja. Keith seemed so untouched by needless fashion and peer pressure - I thought he was a Buddhist!'advertisementHowever, in Aston's experience, this appeal can wear thin. 'Women fall in love and want to nurture this unworldly, slightly vulnerable man and help him grow up. As the relationship settles, though, they often find their own emotional needs aren't being met.'Someone with AS probably has good intentions,' she goes on. 'He wants to make her happy but can't the signs. At the beginning of the courtship the woman could become his obsession and she has probably never experienced such attention. Five years down the line, when he has focussed on something else and returns from work, yet again forgets to say hello and goes to the garage to take the car apart, things are very different. Women often say to me, "He's either got Asperger's or he's the most selfish man on the planet."'Another problem can be the isolation. People with AS frequently have sensory difficulties - loud noise, strong smells and bright lights can be almost painful. This, coupled with difficulties in social interaction, means that parties, family gatherings and big birthdays drop off the radar.'I once saw a couple in their eighties who, after 50 years of marriage, realised what the problem was,' says Aston. 'They decided to stay together, but she bought a cottage up the road and he visited for meals. She could have friends and family over and he had space for his routine and interests. Quite a few couples decide to stay together but live apart.'Penny Jones, an accountant from Oxford, tried this, following the diagnosis of her husband Chris, an IT consultant, six years ago. Chris learnt about AS through a television programme while he was off work with stress. He subsequently saw a specialist who placed him high on the Asperger's scale.'We got together in 1995 and he'd always been very unusual,' says Penny. 'There are lots of positives about Asperger's. I like its straightforwardness. There's no game-playing. Chris was the first person I had met who just let people be themselves. Most men want you to be a bit more like this or more like that. Chris just accepts you. He's also very intelligent - he has an IQ of over 150 - and very funny.'However, AS was hard to live with. 'He did lock himself in the room with the computer,' she says. 'We were under the same roof but not together. Rarely did we share the preparation and clearing away of meals because Chris couldn't stand the noise of cutlery and crockery.'When their children were born - Luke is nine and Beth is seven - Chris found the chaos of family life even more difficult. 'It wasn't predictable and calm enough. Family holidays we gave up on,' she says. 'He would try his best but by day three, without his familiarity, his routine, his computer, you could see all his systems shutting down. Then he'd spend each day with a large crate of beer in front of the television while I took the children out. Chris drank vast quantities to cope with Asperger's - that was another problem.'When Chris moved out, the plan had been that they would remain a couple, but in the end this didn't work out. 'He drank far less and was clearly so much happier in his own space,' says Penny. 'He would spend a few hours with us, then go home to his bolthole and not talk to anyone for 24 hours. In the end, I couldn't cope with the massive periods of time alone.' The couple divorced last year.Conventional counselling isn't recommended for AS couples - in fact, it frequently makes things worse. 'Counselling works on empathy,' says Maxine Aston, 'helping you understand each other's point of view. That won't happen if you have AS. You might be told to spend ten minutes a day talking about your emotions. Someone with AS can't do it, feels pressurised and disappointment sets in.' For this reason, the NAS has a (small) database of couples counsellors who specialise in AS - of which Aston is one.There are many strategies that can help. One is to write things down instead of saying them. Another is for the non-Asperger's half in the relationship to spell things out in no uncertain terms. ('I am feeling sad and would like a hug'), rather than hope their partner will the cues. However, the key is understanding the Asperger's label, accepting its limitations and adjusting expectations. 'It's almost like blaming it on the Asperger's,' says Aston.The diagnosis that saved Keith and Sarah almost happened by accident - Sarah got a job working with ASpire, a charity that supports adults with Asperger's. The more she learnt, the more she recognised in Keith. 'At first, I thought it was just a mad, crazy Sarah idea,' he says. 'But as I researched it, the similarities became too great to ignore.'advertisementLearning about AS, he says, was 'life-changing'. Suddenly what Sarah describes as his 'isolated, biscuit-eating life' made sense. Keith had been bullied at school and gone through university with no friends at all. He'd had only two jobs in his life doing the same thing and two very short-lived relationships (the first at 31). 'From an early age you try to join the world, but gradually, with rejection and not being able to understand social situations, it becomes too taxing,' he says. 'I wanted relationships with women but didn't have the confidence, the tools or the means.'In Sarah, Keith has found the perfect partner. She works with AS adults for a living and now understands his thought processes and almost speaks his language. She can foresee stressful situations, accepts his frequent need to be alone and rarely asks for more than Keith can give.In return, she has a charming, quirky, logical and attentive partner who is still touchingly old-fashioned - he always opens doors for her, carries her shopping and whips off her glasses to clean them if he sees they are dirty. Most importantly, the two clearly love each other's company, share the same sense of humour - and have co-written a book, Asperger Syndrome - A Love Story (Jessica Kingsley, pound;12.99), to show that happy endings are possible, even if they're not quite the endings originally envisaged.There are no plans of marriage or moving in, and Keith certainly doesn't think he could cope with children. But they seem like soul mates. 'With Sarah, I get acceptance and understanding,' says Keith. 'I don't necessarily want to join the rest of the world - but I'd like someone to join me in mine. I'd like to know at the end of my life that there's been one person who got me. That's what Sarah does for me.' /200809/47533

Below, I've listed some of the traits I admire most in people. Although I could probably list a dozen characteristics, I thought I’d list those that seem to be the rarest or most difficult to find.1. Selflessness: In a world where many people don’t have the time or the interest in others, selflessness is a quality that seems to be less and less common. People can be selfless in the time they give, the ability to listen, their level of patience and the love that they give. Those who are giving and generous in nature have the power to make others feel loved, appreciated and special. While those who are self-absorbed tend to do the exact opposite. 无私。忙碌的生活让很多人不愿意去花时间在他人身上或对他人的事感兴趣,无私者越来越少。人们可以通过聆听,交谈和耐心来展示自己的无私。 /201001/95744

Thousands of people flocked to temples across India on Monday following reports that idols of Hindu gods were drinking milk given by devotees as sacred offerings.Teenagers, adults and the aged stood in long lines with garlands and bowls of milk to feed the idols of Lord Shiva, Lord Krishna and the elephant-headed Lord Ganesha.Hundreds chanted hymns in the northern city of Lucknow and the eastern city of Kolkata andwent into hystericswhen the milk held against the idols disappeared."It is amazing, Lord Ganesha drank milk from my hands. Now he will answer all my prayers," said Surama Dasgupta, a middle-aged woman in Kolkata.The frenzy began late on Sunday in some northern cities and soon sp across the country, including the capital New Delhi, even as rationalists and non-believers called it mass hysteria.A similar mania gripped the country in 1995 when thousands of Hindus fed milk in spoons to marble idols of Lord Ganesha.That rumour sp across the globe and there were reports of Hindu deities drinking milk in London, New York and Italy."It is very natural for any stone idol to absorb any liquid and the older the stone the more it absorbs," M.P. Singh, a geology professor at Lucknow University, said.The "milk miracle" came days after thousands of people in the financial hub of Mumbai drank water from a murky Arabian Sea creek as they thought it had miraculously turned sweet and could cure illnesses.But police stepped in and stopped people after Mumbai's civic officials said the water could have temporarily lost itssalinitydue to pollution and inflow offreshwaterfrom a nearby source.周一,数千名印度民众涌向印度各大小寺庙,因为之前有消息称寺庙里的神像喝下了信徒们所供奉的牛奶。青少年、成年人以及老年人手持花环、端着牛奶,排着长队给湿婆神、克利须那神和加内什象鼻神的神像喂奶。喂给神像的牛奶消失之后,印度北部城市勒克瑙和东部城市加尔各答的数百名群众唱起圣歌,陷入疯狂状态。加尔各答一位名叫苏拉玛·达斯古普特的中年妇女说:“太神奇了,加内什神像喝了我手中的牛奶。所以,现在他一定会让我所有的祈求都实现。”上周日晚些时候这股狂热在印度北部的一些城市开始,之后迅速席卷印度全国,其中包括首都新德里,其势头正如唯理论者和非信徒所形容的"大癫狂"。1995年,印度也曾出现过一场类似的狂潮。当时,数千名印度人纷纷拿着勺子给加内什神大理石像喂奶。这个传闻当时传遍全世界,在伦敦、纽约和意大利都出现了有关印度神像会喝牛奶的报道。勒克瑙大学的地质学教授辛格议员说:"其实,石头神像吸收液体是个很自然的现象,而且,石头的年龄越长,吸收的液体会越多。"在“神像喝奶奇迹”发生数天之前,印度金融中心孟买有成千上万人去喝阿拉伯海的一条流里的浑水,他们认为这条流的水奇迹般地变甜了,喝了可以治病。之后,警方插手此事,阻止人们的这一举动。因为孟买的市政官员解释,是污染和附近水域淡水的注入导致海水的盐分可能暂时流失。Vocabulary:go into hysterics : 陷入疯狂状态salinity : 盐分;盐度freshwater : 淡水 /200809/47190

Women who gain more than 40 pounds (18 kg ) during pregnancy have nearly twice the risk of delivering a heavy baby as those who gain less, US researchers said on Friday.The study of more than 40,000 U.S. women and their babies found as many as one in five women gains too much weight during pregnancy, doubling the chances her baby will weigh 9 pounds (4 kg) or more.And they found women who gain more than 40 pounds during pregnancy are more likely to have a heavy baby even if they do not have gestational diabetes, a short-term form of diabetes linked with pregnancy that is known to increase the risk of having a big baby."Because there are so many women who are gaining more than 40 pounds during pregnancy, it's an important health message for most women to avoid excessive weight during pregnancy," Dr. Teresa Hillier of Kaiser Permanente Center for Health Research in Portland, Oregon, whose study appears in the journal Obstetrics amp; Gynecology, said in a telephone interview.Hillier said gaining extra weight during pregnancy increases the risk for having heavy babies, and studies suggest these babies are programed to become overweight or obese later in life.According to the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists, babies who weigh more than 9 pounds at birth are considered heavy.A large baby can pose risks for a difficult delivery -- increasing the chances of vaginal tearing, bleeding, and Caesarian-sections for the mother and the risk of stuck shoulders and broken collar bones for the baby.In the study, Hillier and colleagues examined the medical records of 41,540 women who gave birth in Washington, Oregon and Hawaii from 1995-2003. All had been tested for gestational diabetes and 5.4 percent were treated for it with a program of diet, exercise and insulin, if needed, to control blood sugar.Overall, 20 percent of the women in the study who gained more than 40 pounds -- the upper limit of pregnancy weight gain recommendations in the ed States -- gave birth to heavy babies.Fewer than 12 percent of women in the study with normal weight gain delivered heavy babies, she said.The group at greatest risk were those who gained more than 40 pounds and had gestational diabetes. Nearly 30 percent of these women had heavy babies, compared with 13.5 percent of women with gestational diabetes who had normal weight gains during pregnancy.The researchers said the findings suggest all women should avoid excessive weight gain during pregnancy. And women who are being treated for gestational diabetes should also strive to keep weight gain below 40 pounds."You can't treat the glucose and ignore the weight gain issue," Hillier said.Weight gain during pregnancy has been rising over the past two decades, and some researchers suspect this may be fueling an epidemic of childhood obesity. 美国研究人员于上周五称,怀期间体重增幅超过40磅(18公斤)的女性生出超重婴儿的几率几乎是增重较少女性的两倍。该研究共对美国4万多个女性和她们的宝宝进行了调查。调查结果显示,其中多达五分之一的女性怀期间体重增长过多,这使她们的孩子出生体重达或超过9磅(4公斤)的几率增加了一倍。此外,研究人员发现,期体重增加超过40磅的女性即使没有患妊娠糖尿病,也更易生出体重超标的婴儿。妊娠糖尿病是妇在妊娠期间易患的一种临时性的糖尿病,该病会增加妇生出超重婴儿的风险。位于俄勒冈州波特兰市的凯萨健康研究中心的特里萨#8226; 希利尔士在电话采访中说:“现在有很多妇期体重增幅超过40磅,所以对于大多数女性来说,避免期增重过度是一个很重要的健康信息。”该研究结果在《产科和妇科医学》上发表。希利尔称,期增重过多会增加生出超重婴儿的风险。此外,研究表明,这些孩子日后体重超标或肥胖的可能性也较大。根据美国妇产科医师协会的标准,婴儿出生时体重超过9磅即为超重。胎儿过大会增加难产的风险——产道撕裂、大出血、剖腹产以及婴儿肩难产和锁骨骨折的几率增大。在研究过程中,希利尔及其同事对华盛顿、俄勒冈和夏威夷1995年至2003年间的41540名妇的病历进行了研究。这些妇都接受了妊娠糖尿病检测,其中5.4%的人通过饮食、运动或注射胰岛素(如果需要的话)控制血糖,治疗糖尿病。总体来看,在期体重增幅超过40磅的女性中,有20%的人生下了超重婴儿。在美国,期增重建议最高上限为40磅。她说,期体重增幅在正常范围内的女性中,生下了超重婴儿的不到12%。其中最危险的群体是期增重超过40磅且患有妊娠糖尿病的人,她们当中近30%的人生出了超重婴儿,而这一数字在体重增幅正常、患妊娠糖尿病的妇中仅为13.5%。研究者称,该结果表明,所有女性都要避免期增重过度,而且正在接受妊娠糖尿病治疗的妇也要尽量将体重增幅控制在40磅以内。希利尔说:“妇不能只顾控制血糖,而忽视体重增加的危险。”在过去20年中,女性期增重过度的问题越来越严重。一些研究者认为,这可能会导致儿童肥胖的流行。 /200811/55022

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